WeRelax

Feeling overscheduled and underconnected? In the midst of busy careers, household responsibilities, children’s activities, and all the things we fill our lives with, keeping a close emotional connection with your spouse can take a back seat to other matters that seem more pressing at the time. And, our overextended lives often leave us with little time for real intimacy, and the less quality time we spend together, the greater the chances our relationship will suffer. Lack of intimacy fosters misunderstandings, disagreements and tensions that often lead to disconnection.

We are a busy people serving leftovers in our marriages. Exhausted couples have nothing to share with each other at the end of the day (when most of us get our first real alone time with our spouses). By that time, hearts are depleted and energy is zapped. We try to hold out for a date night or a weekend, but even then we often have little to give to the person who means the most to us. In conflict situations, exhausted people do even more damage. Being tired turns what might other times just be minor annoyances into full-blown battles. Empty, exhausted people rarely come up with loving things to say in these tense interchanges.

On the other hand, there are couples who slow down, create margin and relax. Spare time, leisure time, down time…these are the places that open hearts, deep connections, and successful marriages thrive. Conflict is rare and quickly resolved if encountered. Demands and expectations of others are minimal. Fun and laughter come easy. Marriage in this scenario is amazing.

As individuals, we all need to make time to slow down and recharge. As couples we need to do the same. How do you slow down, relax and recharge as a couple? Below are some tips to help you relax and reconnect. For more tips and info on this month’s NWA Marriage Adventure, click HERE

1. Prioritize. C.S. Lewis said, “The home is the ultimate career. All other careers exist for one purpose, and that is to support the ultimate career.” Plan your work schedule around family life and not the other way around.

2. Constantly Communicate. The busier you are, the greater your need to communicate with your spouse. It can be easy for things to go unsaid and upcoming appointments and events not to be discussed. This will create conflict and tension in your marriage.

3. Create Margin in Your Life. Slow down the pace of life. Intentionally change your pace and create margin–the space between workload and your limits. You must ruthlessly eliminate hurry from your life!

4. Take Advantage of 4 Key Relational Moments Every Day. When you first wake up, how do you greet your spouse? This will set the tone for the day. How do you leave your spouse in the morning? That is the feeling you will hold all day long. When you arrive back home, how do you greet your spouse? This sets the tone for the evening. And how do you say goodnight to your spouse right before you go to bed? This is the feeling you will hold all night long.

5. Have a Regular Date Night. Try to have a date night at least once a month. Date night doesn’t have to mean paying a babysitter to go out to an expensive restaurant. Just you and your spouse connecting and having fun together! For great ideas about this month’s date night, consider going on our NWA Marriage Adventure!